One of the greatest books in the business world is Dale Carnegie’s How to Win Friends and Influence People. The aim of the book is to help people learn that the best way to convince people is not through demands and force but rather through caring about them. I believe that Dale Carnegie’s book could be very helpful in evangelizing. Here are his nine principles and some personal commentary.

Principle 1: Begin with praise and honest appreciation.
 As Christians we believe that people are good people and when we want them to become Catholic, I think that it best to approach them in a way that shows them that we want them to be a part of our faith family. People want to belong, and God is calling them. People though don’t want to feel like a burden so if they feel like they have something to offer then they are most likely to give Church a chance.

Principle 2: Call attention to people’s mistakes indirectly.
 When we directly attack someone’s sinfulness we can drive them away. If however, we offer then the answer to their deepest desire (God), they will then begin to see their sinfulness and make a mend for it not out of fear of punishment but rather out of a desire to return God’s love.

Principle 3: Talk about your own mistakes before criticizing the other person.
 The greatest way to bring someone to Christ is to do so by sharing one’s own faith story. I know that I grow closer to God when I hear someone else tell me their faith story. I believe it is similar with alcoholics. By sharing their stories, they remain sober.

Principle 4: Ask questions instead of giving direct orders. 
 As Catholics we believe that God is the ultimate fulfillment of our every desire and that every human being is searching for God. Sometimes the wise teacher asks the right question in order to get them thinking about what it is that are searching for.

Principle 5: Let the other person save face.
 People are like turtles. If you want them to come out of their shell you have to make them feel comfortable. The best way to make them feel comfortable but the best way to do that is to let people know they are in an environment where they will not be judged.

Principle 6: Praise the slightest improvement and praise every improvement. Be “hearty in your approbation and lavish in your praise.”
 Following Christ is a hard thing especially for beginners. Praising someone helps them remain steadfast in this new way of life.

Principle 7: Give the other person a fine reputation to live up to.
 We are called to be role models for others - plain and simple.

Principle 9: Make the other person happy about doing the things you suggest. 
 Being a Catholic should not have to be drudgery. It is rather a great joy. Does our personal outlook on life help others to see it?

Changing The World through Changing Yourself
When I was a young man, I wanted to change the world. I found it was difficult to change the world, so I tried to change my nation. When I found I couldn't change the nation, I began to focus on my town. I couldn't change the town and as an older man, I tried to change my family. Now, as an old man, I realize the only thing I can change is myself, and suddenly I realize that if long ago I had changed myself, I could have made an impact on my family. My family and I could have made an impact on our town. Their impact could have changed the nation and I could indeed have changed the world. - Unknown Monk (1100AD)

"When it comes to change, there are three seasons of timing: People change when they hurt enough that they have to, when they learn enough that they want to, and when they receive enough that they are able to." - John Maxwell

The challenge for the Christian is not necessarily to convert another person to the faith but to do so with love instead of with force.