Spirituality 
09-16

               Today, unfortunately, we are misled by a number of misconceptions about prayer and liturgy.  Too commonly we accept the following set of axioms as wise: Creativity and variety are always good.  Every prayer-celebration should be one of high energy.  Longer is better than shorter.  Either you should pray with feeling or you shouldn’t pray at all.  Ritual is meaningless unless we are emotionally invested in it.
                Each of these axioms is overly romantic, ill thought out, anthropologically naïve, and not helpful in sustaining a life of prayer.  Prayer is a relationship, a long-term one, and lives by those rules.  Relating to anyone long-term has its ups and downs.  Nobody can be interesting all the time, sustain high energy all the time, or fully invest himself or herself all time.  Never travel with anyone who expects you to be interesting, lively, and emotionally invested all the time.  Real life doesn’t work that way.  Neither does prayer.  What sustains a relationship over the long term is ritual, routine, a regular rhythm that incarnates the commitment.  – 79&80
Rolheiser, Ronald: Our One Great Act of Fidelity: Waiting for Christ in the Eucharist (New York: Double Day Publishers, 2011)

Here is how the Our Father refocuses us away from the Seven Deadly Sins

Prayer is a conversation with God, not a formula. Yet sometimes we might need to use a “method” to freshen up our prayer time. We can pray the Psalms or other Scriptures (such as The Lord’s Prayer), or use the ACTS method (Adoration, Confession, Thanksgiving, and Supplication). I recently came across this “Five-Finger Prayer” to use as a guide when praying for others:

• When you fold your hands, the thumb is nearest you. So begin by praying for those closest to you—your loved ones (Phil. 1:3–5).
Father, give me the wisdom to know how to pray for others.

• The index finger is the pointer. Pray for those who teach—Bible teachers and preachers, and those who teach children (1 Thess. 5:25).

• The next finger is the tallest. It reminds you to pray for those in authority over you—national and local leaders, and your supervisor at work (1 Tim. 2:1–2).

• The fourth finger is usually the weakest. Pray for those who are in trouble or who are suffering (James 5:13–16).

• Then comes your little finger. It reminds you of your smallness in relation to God’s greatness. Ask Him to supply your needs (Phil. 4:6, 19)

Whatever method you use, just talk with your Father. He wants to hear what’s on your heart.

I personally have found journaling to be an excellent way to pray.  Journaling has to be more than just writing down one’s feelings or making a timeline of the events of one’s life if it is to be true prayer.  Prayer is above all about relationship with God and so the following are some tips for making the most out of this prayerful activity.
 
1. Prepare
Remember to take the time to prepare to journal.  Don’t simply start writing.  Instead make sure that you are in an environment that will be conducive to prayer.  Take time to prepare your environment so that you are in a quiet space that is conducive to prayer.  Some people like to pray in a Church during Eucharistic Adoration, I personally enjoy praying in a special prayer area in my room where I know that I will most likely not be disturbed. 
 
2. Praying for Openness
If prayer is truly a communication between two people who really care about each other then it is important that both parties feel like they can be themselves.  This can only happen if both parties are honest with each other and are able to admit their faults and weakness.  This is extremely important when it comes to our relationship with God because God is like a parent or coach who continually wants us to do better.  He is that confidant who desires to help us overcome any obstacle that is in our way.  We should never be afraid to admit to God our weaknesses for fear that He will leave us for Jesus shows us that nothing can separate us form the love of God.
 
Sometimes it is important for us to tell God how we are feeling even if they are not pleasant feelings.  For example you may be angry with God because of the death of a love one, it is important that you express this feeling to God so that you can work it out. 
 
Remember that a key part of prayer is listening!!! For me when I pray by journaling, I can hear God in subtle ways as I write. 
 
3. Formula for Prayer
I have found that my prayer is best when I begin by praising God.  Sometimes in life we can forget how lucky we are that a person is our friends because we begin to take him or her for granted.  By taking a moment to remind ourselves how lucky we are that he or she is our friend we are less likely to take our friendship for granted.  Could there be a greater and more awesome friend than God?  Besides do you like it when every time you talk to a person he or she spends the entire time complaining?
 
The second thing I do is talk to God about my concerns.  Not because I think He does not know them but rather because I believe that God wants to know what is on my mind.  He loves me so much that He really wants to know how I feel about things going on in my life.  While I write to God about my concerns, I am careful to listen to God pointing out to me how I should behave in these situations and at how God has worked in my life in similar situations in the past.  I express all of this with a naked honesty.  If I have screwed up I admit it – no excuses.  If I have done something well, I thank God for the graces that allowed me to accomplish it for I know that I am nothing without Him.  Finally if I don’t know the answer to a situation, I do not pretend that I do but rather openly admit it to my good friend God.

Finally, I spend some time thanking God for the time that I have just shared with Him and thanking Him for being such a good friend and powerful ally in my daily struggles.

It seems that one of the hardest things for Catholics is to lead people in prayer out loud.  We seem to get tongued tied when we are asked to prayer.  One of the best things I learned in the seminary is this simple prayer formula called “You, Who, Do, Through”.  This simple formula is actually the basis for the Opening and Closing prayers at Mass.  Let us take a look at this formula.

You
The “You” in the formula always refer to God.  So when we begin to pray let us acknowledge God the Father by one of His many title for example: God, Father, Heavenly Father, Creator, etc.

Who
The “Who” part of the prayer is always about naming something God has done for example “Who made heaven and earth” or “Who sent Your Son to redeem us.”

Do
The “Do” part is where we ask God to do something for us or for another for example “help my sick father,” or “help young people to do your will.”

Through
The “Through” part of the prayer is always about Jesus.  We always ask God to hear our prayers through Jesus by saying for example “We ask this through Christ our Lord,” “We ask all these things in the name of Your Son,” or “We ask all of this in Jesus’ name.”

Example
Heavenly Father (You)
You have called John and Katie to this wonderful day (Who)
Please bless them on this their marriage day and keep them always in your love (Do)
We ask this through your Son Jesus.  (Through)

In an article called “How to Hear God: When Life Falls Apart” in a magazine called Shalom Tidings.  Joe Phillips puts forth a simple method of prayer that I would like to share with you.  The following are quotes from his articles:
 
Stop: Take a moment and think about today, become aware of your motivations, fears, desires, and distractions.  Think about people you have met, the thoughts that you have had experiences, classes, traffic jams, parties, fights, conversations with friends, frustrations, whatever… if it helps, make a list on paper.  The point of this step is obvious but essential.  Stop. Rewind. Reflect. 
 
Look: When it comes to recognizing God’s presence, first stop, and then look.  Look at your life from the perspective of “we” and not “I”.  Your day is not just full of things that have happened to you.  From God’s perspective, your day has always been about things that happening between you and God.  Your day, your problems, your joys and sorrows are how God is relating with you.  So stop, And then look.
 
Listen: Finally, recognizing God’s presence is mostly about learning to be present to God.  He is always there.  SO if God is always relating with us in our daily lives, we should let Him speak to us.  We need practice listening.  As you talk with Him about what is happening between the two of you today, ask Him what it means to your relationship with Him, what He thinks about it, what He wants you to do, etc.  Then wait for him to respond.  Just be silent.  This, of course, is perhaps the hardest part about praying, but it is also the only way to grow in prayer.

Stoplights As A Spiritual Thermometer
When I was a sophomore in college seminary, I attended a month long retreat called PFP. One of the speakers was a young Dominican priest, unfortunately I cannot remember his name, and he spoke to us about stoplights. He told us how he used his reaction to red lights as a kind of spiritual thermometer.

When he would come up to a red light and throw a fit because the light was red and was slowing him down he realized that he was not in a good place in his spiritual life. If he came to a red light and it did not bother him then he realized that he was most likely in a good place in his spiritual life i.e. he had prayed that morning and felt close to God.

He challenged us to look for the spiritual stop lights (or as I like to call them spiritual thermometers) and to pay close attention to them because they could be great warning signs in regards to whether or not our relationship with God is on track because one of the fruits of the good spiritual life is peace.

What could some of your spiritual thermometers be in your life? For me I have discovered that my attitude toward the people I minister to can be a good one or my reaction to the telephone ringing when I am busy and not expecting it.

Stoplight As a Reminder of Our Plan
Jesus makes it clear in the Gospels and Paul reiterates it in his letters that to be a Christian means to continually repent from one's old way of life full of sin and to begin adopting the new habits of the life that Christ wishes to give us. While repentance can kind of just happen, I think it is better for each of us to have a plan. We should all take time to examine our lives and see what we need to stop doing and what we should start doing. I think a stop light can be an awesome reminder of our plan.

 Red Light- Name one thing that you think God wants you to "stop" doing.

Yellow Light - Name one thing that you need to "yield" to God. What is one area of your life that you have stubbornly kept from God? Where is there an area in your faith in which you disagree with the Church's teaching? What are you doing to resolve this difference?

Green Light - Name one thing that you will "go" out and do now. What good habit are your going to start to replace the bad habit that you stop doing? What charity are you going to help out?